8 Biggest Arranged Marriage Pros and Cons | Flow Psychology


articles on arranged marriages

Read more about this on Questia. marriage, socially sanctioned union that reproduces the viguzgas.ga all societies the choice of partners is generally guided by rules of exogamy (the obligation to marry outside a group); some societies also have rules of endogamy (the obligation to marry within a group). Apr 27,  · Arranged marriages seem odd-or even wrong--to most Americans. Traditional cultures also have a negative view of Western love marriages. Why are arranged marriages so common around the world? What. Figures show % year-on-year rise in forced marriages involving Somali children Published: 26 Aug UK Somali teenagers taken 'on holiday' and forced into marriage.

Why Are So Many Indian Arranged Marriages Successful? | Psychology Today

The boy is in good state job in Mississippi and cannot come to New York. The girl must relocate to Mississippi. But I did take heart in articles on arranged marriages fact that it was addressed only to me. My parents, in a very earnest bid to secure my eternal happiness, have been trying to marry me off to, well, just about anyone lately.

In my childhood home near Sacramento, my father is up at night on arranged-marriage Websites. Our prospective husbands have to be rich and socially conscious, hip but down-to-earth. My father saw my mother once before they got married. I was more precocious when it came to affairs of the heart, having enjoyed my first kiss with cute Matt from the football squad at At the time, I was working as a journalist in Singapore.

Before long, though, I gathered that he was of a type: someone who prided himself on being modern and open-minded but who in fact had horribly crusty notions passed down from his Indian parents. I lodged my protest against him and arranged marriage by getting ragingly intoxicated and blowing smoke rings in his face. Indeed, I rarely thought of marriage at the time. To an Indian, articles on arranged marriages, marriage is a matter of karmic destiny. At a recent dinner party, when I was trying to explain how single-minded Indian parents can be, my friend Jaidev jumped to the rescue.

You have a girl in mind? What are your intentions? The pressure on me to articles on arranged marriages a husband started very early.

Much savvier in the ways of his new country, my father laughed it off. Fulfilling his parental duty, my father placed matrimonial ads for me every couple of years during my twenties in such immigrant newspapers as India Abroad. Root vegetables like carrots are verboten. This is only a little shocking, since my last boyfriend was a Spanish chef who got me addicted to chorizo. Within these sites are sub-sites for Indian regions, like punjabimatrimony.

Far from being a novel approach to matrimony, these sites are a natural extension of how things have been done in India for decades. He uploaded my profile on several, indicating that only men living in New Articles on arranged marriages City need apply nota bene, Mr. Ramesh Gupta. Unfortunately, in the world of shaadi. My father also wrote my profile.

Like most Indians of their articles on arranged marriages, my parents believe there are only two legitimate professions: doctor and engineer not medicine and engineering, but doctor and engineer. The articles on arranged marriages is that while he wants doctor or engineer, my heart beats for the diametric opposite. Take the aging but rakish foreign correspondent I was smitten with last year.

I found it terribly sexy that he rode a Harley, perhaps less so that his apartment was decorated with Wonder Woman paraphernalia. I will admit to needing a little romantic assistance. There was Sadakat, the half-Finnish, half-Pakistani barrister from London who slept most of the day and worked most of the night writing a book on criminal justice. Circumscribed within this schedule, our dates would begin at midnight. Once I fell asleep on the bar during the middle of one. Then there were the ones who simply never called again.

It was our first real date, and I was flattered—and encouraged—that he was already cooking for me. Then, during dessert, Alex started talking about his long-distance Japanese girlfriend.

I spat out my espresso. Not done yet, he also sought my advice on how to ask out the cute girl from his gym. Was it something I did? Perhaps I should have brought an old-world wine? It was during a trip to Argentina that I met Juan Carlos, a black-haired, green-eyed painter—of buildings, not canvases.

Nothing fazed Juan Carlos, however. I wrote your name in a tree, but the branch fell. I have written your name in my heart, and time will guard it. One of the first setups I agreed to took place a year ago.

He took the train into the city to meet me at a Starbucks. He was wearing pants that ended two inches before his ankles, articles on arranged marriages. What are you looking for? And in their tone-deafness, some of these men resemble the parents spurring them on. One Sunday, I was woken by a call at 9 A. A woman with a heavy Indian accent asked for Anita.

These days, I do have my limits, articles on arranged marriages. And it is much the same as I imagine it must be for any active dater. Another time, I met a very sweet-seeming journalist for lunch in Chinatown. After he left, I asked my friend what he thought. He gave me a sidelong glance, and we both burst into laughter. As with any singles Website geared toward one community, you also get your interlopers.

Mark said he believed Indians and Jews shared similar values, like family and education. But when I met him for dinner, he seemed a decade older than he was, articles on arranged marriages, which made me feel like I was a decade younger. Once, he was particularly taken with a suitor who claimed to be a brain surgeon at Johns Hopkins and friends articles on arranged marriages a famous Bollywood actress, Madhuri Dixit.

I was suspicious, articles on arranged marriages I agreed to speak to the fellow. I refused to talk to him again, even though my father persisted in thinking I was bullheaded. Sometimes, though, you get close, really close. I liked the fact that he was Indian-American but had returned to India to work. We had great conversations on the phone—among other things, he had interesting views on how people our age were becoming more sexually liberated in Indian cities—and I began envisioning myself kept in the finest silk saris.

Back for a break in New York, Sameer kindly came to see me in Brooklyn, articles on arranged marriages. My Bombay dreams went up in smoke. In this, I guess I am like articles on arranged marriages other woman in New York, complaining a man is too ambitious or not ambitious enough, too eager or not eager enough.

But they are picky, too. These men, in their bid to fit in on Wall Street or on the golf course, would like a wife who is eminently presentable—to their boss, friends, and family. I have a lot of things going on in my life. Indian men also seem to share my belief that Westerners have made the progression toward marriage unnecessarily agonizing. In more traditional arranged marriages—which are still very much alive and well in India—couples may get only one or two meetings before their wedding day.

In America, articles on arranged marriages, and in big Indian cities, a couple may get a few months before they are expected to walk down the aisle, or around the fire, as they do seven times, in keeping with Hindu custom. By now I certainly think that would be enough time for me. Other Indian women I know seem to be coming to the same conclusion. My friend Divya works the overnight shift at the BBC in London and articles on arranged marriages out clubbing on her nights off.

Imagine my surprise when I discovered she was on keralamatrimony. I was under the impression her hobbies were more along the lines of trance music and international politics. When I go out on a first date with an Indian man, I find myself saying things I would never utter to an American. But with that also comes a certain relief. With other forms of dating the options seem limitless. Ditto for the one-night stand. Try articles on arranged marriages that one to my parents.

The not-knowing-where-something-is-headed can be wildly exciting. It can also be a tad soul-crushing. Just ask any single woman in New York. But after a decade of Juan Carloses and short-lived affairs with married men and Craigslist flirtations and emotionally bankrupt boyfriends and, oddly, the most painful of all, articles on arranged marriages, the guys who just never call, it no longer seems like the most outlandish possibility.

And no modern woman wants to close the door on any of her options—no matter how traditional—too hastily. Already a subscriber?

Log in or link your magazine subscription. Account Profile. Sign Out. The author in her Fort Greene apartment. Photo: Gillian Laub. The author and her family in the seventies. Photo: Courtesy of Anita Jain.


Forced marriage | Society | The Guardian


articles on arranged marriages


8 Biggest Arranged Marriage Pros and Cons Arranged marriages are highly traditional practices where a family chooses a spouse for their child, sometimes before they are even born. The child typically have little to no say in the matter, and are forced into the marriage in order to gain financial or social advantages for their viguzgas.ga: Flow Psychology Editor. Arranged marriages have always been a debatable subject. It is in the major outlook on relationships that Indians are vastly different, in the way they perceive the institution of marriage, to those beliefs of other countries especially in the west. Nov 24,  · arranged viguzgas.ga most of them are getting affairs with another viguzgas.ga they are cheatting their viguzgas.ga one of my friends is inlove with a married indian viguzgas.gar of my friends.